A few years ago I attended the inaugural American DJ Association’s conference/seminar in Las Vegas and networked with some of the best wedding entertainment specialists in North America. (The show is now The Las Vegas DJ Show).
One of the best among them was from my friend Brandon Lindsey, a wedding DJ based in Cincinnati Ohio. His presentation gave me a list of great new ideas and perspectives, and reinforced many of my existing practices. Interestingly, it was something he said AFTER the seminar in a casual conversation that stood out.
He said that often when planning their big day, brides are afraid of the “Wedding Police”. By this, he was referring to the many posts on wedding forums like Weddings.co.nz or The Knot in the USA or Australia where a bride asks “Is it OK to do xxxxxx at my wedding?”
Don’t be afraid to break the rules, bend tradition or create new ones! Apart from a few legal requirements during the ceremony, you can do whatever you like as there’s no right or wrong..
Here’s three quick tips to ensure that you’re in control, NOT the Wedding Police:
- Listen to advice, but choose your own path. If it feels like a professional supplier is trying to tell you how to do something, investigate their “why”. It might be it’s just easier for them. Get a 2nd or 3rd opinion, but don’t be afraid to just do what feels right for you
- Avoid asking “What is everyone else using/doing” questions on Facebook wedding groups and bridal forums. You’ll risk creating self doubt when you find nobody else is doing what you thought was a good idea.
- OWN IT! Sure, some guests or family may not agree with your plans and ideas, but you may be the same about their own wedding. Put yourself in their shoes: if you were a guest at their wedding and you didn’t like their ceremony songs or reception order, will you get up and leave the wedding in disgust? Same applies at your wedding, nobody will be so offended they leave. The truth is they won’t remember it a few days later while you’ll have the right memories of your wedding day for a lifetime.
The thing is – it’s YOUR wedding. There are no wedding police that will come to your wedding ceremony or reception and tell you your songs are wrong, or your speeches were in the wrong order, or you’ve broken with tradition. Nobody is checking up on you, so you’re free to plan your wedding your way!
I hope this helps!